Yesterday I didn’t have to open and close. It appears things are about to settle in. Well, in my office at least. My lead is back from her LOA, which I am grateful for. Maybe I can catch up on my z’s? Doubtful but still hopeful. Now that she’s back I will actually get a weekend. I know given those two days I can get a lot done for the shops. It’s time to kick it into gear.

Since my office is finally settling in I got to spend the evening just being and having fun with the hubby. We haven’t really had date night in a while – nor have we really seen each other much. So, being able to relax was good and needed. Now it’s just everything else that needs to settle.

I also got to talk to a friend, which was nice. Ok, that sounds like I don’t talk to my friends on the daily but I do. I’m quite the social butterfly – I’m really not but I’m definitely no hermit. I was able to get something off my chest, which was nice. There are some things going on that you just sometimes need to just unload and let go. I did with this friend and it helped things settle. Well, nothing is settled. Far from settled but it validated my feelings.

Aaahh, settling things and feelings. Feelings is a tricky thing. Someone had come by for a visit and we had a lot of fun. It was just a short visit but they made me laugh so hard which I seriously needed. We talked a bit then a certain subject came up and I was amazed at how that subject alone tore at my heart. I don’t know if it was a sad tore at my heart kind of a thing rather an ef you kind of thing. I was astounded that I was letting my feelings dictate my day. I hate when that bloody happens. So I’m determined to not allow that to happen. I’m determined to just live in the moment, take life by the balls and just live. I’ve been so focused on my past lately that I’ve finally realized it’s bringing me down.

I don’t know where I’m going with this. Maybe to say that there’s no passion to be found in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable living? Someone out there may think I am now the biggest hypocrite. So, here’s the thing, I’m not. I will not settle on my life. Don’t ever let anyone dictate the way you live your life. How you live it is your prerogative. You make the choices in your life not anyone else. And yes, there will be choices that are questionable but it is your life and don’t allow people to make you feel like a complete idiot for those choices.

I didn’t settle in life – even if sometimes it looks like I do. I know what I want. I am reminded of it on a daily. It is attainable. People may not see it but I do. You shouldn’t give up what you want most for what you want now. Don’t make that mistake. I know what I want and it isn’t wrong.

Dana Claudat really said it best, “settling for less makes you feel less. It actually makes your energy smaller. Deciding to not settle might mean you have to wait longer or challenge the typical, but if you are passionate about what you are creating in life, the way always appears.” I just want to do what is right.

There is my rambling for the day. I think this was more of a feels and get it all out blog. None of this makes sense to me. But, ya know, it is what it is.