The sun has set on the first half of the year.
I traveled most of the day today willing to spend even just a few hours with my mom. I left my home with the sun on my back warming the mountains and awakening everything that slumbered. As I returned home I got to watch the sun become sleepy as it set on the horizon, burning away the day. As I drove with my music on full blast and my family in slumber I spent the time just in contemplation. I watched the sun color the sky in beauty as it bid good night to the world. And, in a sense, as the first six months stand behind me, I feel that is what I have done as well.
Six months into the year.
I have burnt and built bridges.
I have said hello and goodbye.
I have loved and loathed.
I have laughed and cried.
I have walked and ran.
I have completed and shattered.
I have stood in the shade and basked in the sun.
Six months into the year.
As I watched the sun set and give way to the rising moon I was reminded that even the sun sets in paradise. And that is okay. It is okay to have the sun set on your past. It is okay to have the amazng memories that you can never get rid of because you were happy. It is okay to remember the walk on the beach, the laughter going down the street, the dinner lessons, and the music dates. It is okay to remember the way your heart beat at the sound of your name, the way your head becomes light at the closeness, or the way your throat becomes dry when you meet eye to eye.
As I watched the moon and stars begin to take shape I was reminded that the sun will rise and fall regardless of what happened the previous day so it is important to take advantage of all the light has to offer you. It is important to hold hands even when you’re upset. It is important to be kind and not use harsh words to lift someone even when you’d rather ignore them. As the stars fight to light the night sky it is important to remember the love, the forgiveness, the patience. It is important to remember the spark, the lessons learned, the fight and will to be together.
My sun has burnt the sky that consumes me. And these last six months I have allowed the sun to set in many parts of my life without being willing to say the proper goodbye. I dwelled on the negatives, the wonderings of what I did wrong. I took up occupancy with the idea that I didn’t deserve to be happy because my sun decided to set. I existed only because I had no other choice. I had lost my own light, so busy worrying about keeping the light of others lit that I didn’t care whether mine burned.
And that is the worst mistake I’ve made. As the new month begins I think of how amazing the quote from Walt Whitman is,”Keep your face always toward the sunshine and the shadows will fall behind you.” If you can stay positive – even for but a minute of your day at a time – you will move mountaints. You will watch the shadows from your life disappear. So, here I am asking you to let the sun shine on your skin and allow the shadows to fall to the ground. And as they fall, as they call out your name and you have your back on it, be happy, be excited, be ready for a new sunrise.
Happy second half of the year. xoxo