I am not a creative person. Ya, sure I can throw out a poem or two or an occasionally moving blog post. But, move past that I am as gray as they come. All of that didn’t stop me from having a girls night out to get my paint on.
I’ve never really painted in my life. The first time I tried my hand at painting was this past May at my church’s Women’s Retreat. We painted a sunflower that time around and I must say I didn’t do too shabby of a job. I actually quite liked how decent I did. I found a way to make the painting my own and I was content.
Fast forward four months later (I can’t believe it’s been only four months) and I’m back at it again. This time out was Paint Nite at a local establishment in Vancouver. A bunch of us girls signed up. Some weren’t able to make it because of a new mama in labor (prayers to mama and baby) but it was a good night. We got to try our hands at painting an owl.
I was immediately intrigued because it’s an owl. I’m fascinated by them. I laugh and joke that they just may be my ‘aumakua (Hawaiian spirit animal). I also drew up an owl tattoo that I hope to get soon. All beside the point.
It was a rough weekend for me – all following a really tough work week. My brain has been going a gazillion miles per minute. Everything from what I haven’t done at work to what I need to do at home has really forced me to focus and do all that I can to keep pushing through. I was finding a way to get out of tonight because I could have been working instead of playing. Thankfully I gave myself a break and did this…
My owl didn’t come out like the quirky instructor’s. But, it came out with a flare of Pearl. Which, I suppose should be pretty important considering it was my painting. But it did remind me of a few things…
Both paintings have come during a time in my life I needed some sort of encouragement. Both took me out of my comfort zone.
The sunflower represented happiness. That weekend in May was undoubtedly one of the best weekends of my year. Or few years. The sunflower allowed me to be reminded of the joy in my life. Of being able to look up when all else is failing and know God is in control.
As for the owl? Well, the owl reminds me that though I feel like I am swimming in troubled waters my strength comes from above. Owls are usually known for wisdom and strength. They are animals that signify transition.
I am at a point in my life where transition has been imminent. I’ve taken steps to become better – a better daughter, a better wife, a better person for the world. Most importantly a better person for me. I struggle a lot accepting who I am. My looks. My thoughts. My voice. My abilities. Tonight as I was surrounded by amazing women I realized the shedding away of my old feathers for some brighter ones is exactly what I need. To allow myself the chance to change. To allow myself to be the woman God wants me to be.
And so, my owl will sit beside my sunflower in my office as a reminder that I am not alone. That God is in control. And that joy will come in the morning no matter how dark the night.