Oi, will the paperwork ever end?
I guess that’s where you really start. Sure, there is the agency research and the endless hours reading literally everything you can about fostering and adopting but the paperwork is where the ball begins to roll. I printed out the paperwork and for the last two days I’ve just looked at it. I’m feeling anxious.
There is nearly forty pages of this. And this is just to get licensed. I’m submitting the actual application tomorrow since today is a holiday. Then it’s the waiting game and prepping everything. The application I was told will take a few weeks. We will receive a letter in the mail instructing us of who our licensor is and how we go about the next process: fingerprints. All of that is fine and well. It’s the waiting that is gonna drive me bonkers.
The only thing I have ever known I wanted to be was a mom. I watched my mom and how much joy it brought to her. I watched my hanai mom with that same joy. I see all of my friends who dote and adore their kiddos. My heart swells when I am around babies. In fact, I got the pleasure last night of watching all my nieces and nephews while my mom guys went to the casino. I snuggled next to my baby niece, Loke as she slept. Be. Still. My. Heart. That one is absolutely precious.
While the hurt from the miscarriages have been given to God, the longing to be a mama is still there. It intensifies while on nursery duty and during mPact. It becomes concentrated when I am with my nieces and nephews. It enhances when I walk through the baby aisles at Target or Ross. I’ve never been good at patience and this licensing process is gonna try it. Lord, give me the patience to stay in Your will.
Our licensor will be the one that we ask all the questions to. I think we have most answered but I’m sure as this process continues we will go crazy on what we can and can’t do. I know that most of the application pack doesn’t get turned in until AFTER we get assigned a licensor. Patience. I think maybe that’s why we are doing this and going through this process, I’m being taught patience.
Anyway, all of this to say, the paperwork is never ending. The packet that they give us at orientation isn’t even all the paperwork we turn in. We have the fingerprints, the background check, the medical shots and physicals, the certificates from the trainings. There are a lot. And I’m being told – keep copies of everything. It makes sense, I learned that early on in life. I’m anxious for this to happen. I want the paperwork done. It’ll all be a blur when it is all said and done. I should just enjoy the process, as much as I can at least.
Little one, the stress is real. But so very worth it. xoxo