This morning started off as a real struggle. I was glad to have had my office to myself as I spent much of the morning in tears. It felt like this morning everything had to hit. I’ve been having some really tough days at work with a huge project and all the little ones that I am responsible for plus my normal daily responsibilities. It has been a never ending struggle. Depression seems to hit at the most inopportune times. Today was no different.
I struggled to find something to keep me pushing today. My mind often went to thoughts that shouldn’t be allowed the time of day. I struggled to focus on my work. I struggled to focus with socializing. I struggled to just be. Then I went on one of my social media pages and saw a video that talked about being enough for yourself. The video is about the need to always keep fighting no matter how rough it is. The video was about loving yourself, being your own companion.
So, in an effort to understand and believe that I am enough I’ve decide to list the reasons why I love myself so the world can see. I was told to write this list for myself but truth be told keeping it to myself wouldn’t make me believe. Keeping it to myself wouldn’t change the heaviness. Keeping it to myself wouldn’t possibly inspire someone else.
I want to change the world. I want to be able to motivate people to love themselves. I can’t possibly do that if I don’t love myself. So, here goes nothing. I love myself because…
- God first loved me. Nothing is more important than my faith.
- I love deep. I give everything I am to love you even when you can’t love me back.
- I want to learn everything about anything.
- I have values that cannot be broken because I know what it feels like to sacrifice who you are and hope that what you care about someone will one day care about as well.
- I don’t fit the status quo. You won’t see me as a basketball or football geek. Or a minion lover. Or that I’m quirky once my guard is down.
- Even if you have hurt me over and over again, even if you have shattered my heart, I will forgive you.
- I name and befriend pretty much all inanimate objects.
- My active imagination, which can often make me very animated.
- My passion to change the world because it makes me want to better myself.
Okay, this isn’t the greatest list out there. But, over two hours ago I had absolutley nothing. In fact, I was sure that there was nothing about me that I loved.
I need you to understand that life isn’t perfect. You aren’t perfect. Life can suck, pretty badly. But, you need to remember, your height is perfect for you. Your butt is perfect for you. Your smile brightens people’s day. Your real laugh fills a heart. Your past is what has made you who you are.
Be in love with yourself. Be in love with who you are. Be in love with who God intended you to be. You are enough, and never let anyone tell you differently. Be your own companion. Be your own best friend because, my darling, there will be people who say they love you and will break you. There will be people who can be so charming that you fall for the way they enter your life, but you need to be strong in who you are to not get bit by the snake. You are so enough, it is unbelievable how enough you are.
You do not need anyone to validate your amazing self. Respect yourself. See yourself as the world sees you. See yourself and the beautifulness of what makes you you. Love yourself for your blonde moments, your lack of a vocal chord, falling face first as often as you try not to. Love yourself for knowing exactly who you are or who you aren’t. Love yourself when the world is cold. Never let society and insecurity tell you how absolutely beautiful you are. You are enough.
Be gentle with yourself. You are doing the best you can. Wake up every morning and choose to be you. Your love and affection that you give everyone else? You deserve that too. Love yourself because you are enough. Even if you don’t believe it now. I believe it for you. Don’t let past mistakes make you believe differently. Don’t let people in your life pollute your mind. Don’t let a broken heart make you stop breathing. Be comfortable in your own skin. First love yourself and others will follow. You are strong. You are smart. You are incredible.
You. Are. Enough. And so am I. xoxo